KNOW YOUR BOUNDARIES

The importance of setting clear rules for yourself in terms of how others may communicate with you and treat you can not be emphasized enough. We have to know our boundaries. Often we neglect our boundaries for the sake of being loved and accepted by others. And likewise, we sabotage our own well-being. No matter if as a mother, as a wife/partner, as a friend or as a professional.

The reason why we try to please others more than ourselves by being handy is the wound or are the wounds in our lower chakras. First of all, the root chakra, Muladhara.

To dare to set clear boundaries, we need to feel safe, and we need to have enough confidence and self-trust.

Many of us have a weak root chakra that shows in compensations like material possession and physical experiences, such as food/ the experience of eating and the feeling of food in our belly. Food has a lot of grounding effects on our bodies. Our root chakra's weakness shows, especially in fear of the lack of cohesion of a group. That’s the source of our constant strive for pleasing others and being loved and accepted by them. There is an unfulfilled need—a gap.

We can fill this gap and heal the wound within us by working with the chakras. The root chakra can be nourished by

• processing possible trauma of our early years in life

• developing a new understanding of our physicality, including letting go of fear of pain

• dealing with existential fears

• dealing with our bodies to release fear and to feel the body (e.g. massage, yoga or body therapies)

• physical pleasure in the form of good food, tenderness, cuddling, sex

• interaction with nature, e.g. gardening, trees, forest, sun, especially evening sun, mountains, the sea

All that work will turn out in a feeling of deeper groundedness, a deeper connection to the earth and therefore, a clearer “living in the present moment”. With this greater awareness, the ability to feel where our boundaries are can be experienced more precisely and therefore communicated with more confidence and faith. Other people will feel that clarity and will follow our rules. Most importantly, you won’t feel bad about expressing your boundaries because now you can feel that you are communicating a fact rather than asking someone for a favour.

This is true liberation from that constant urge to diminish your own needs to be accepted by others.

The need to belong to a group is a relict of our earliest years. Without the connection to a tribe, we would have literally been condemned to die. But this doesn’t apply anymore, now that we are adults. The feeling of safeness is a result of feeling the connection to our extended Mother Earth and the anchor within us, especially the awareness of our pelvis energy.

Nourishing and healing the root chakra and the capability to set boundaries and rules go hand in hand.

In my workbook on the chakras and female energy, you can learn more about it guided with some beneficial journal questions to inquire more deeply about your body's specific energies and their expression in your life.

Please contact me if you need more advice at any time.

Lovingly,

Indra

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